[this would be so much easier to deal with if his nerves weren't fraying with every beat of his heart

he doesn't run up the hill so much as stumble up it, fighting down the invading feelings that are poking at him like an exposed, raw nerve.

he thought that he had something to say to that white figure, but once he's at the tree he doesn't know what the words were anymore]

. . . I don't understand.