[open post]

[one_note]

[for meme overflows etc.!]

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[weiyingdown]

[waggles the fingers of the caught hand at him]

[one_note]

[tugs him in until they're standing by each other at the counter and puts an arm around him firmly, still dealing with the food preparations with his other hand

there, now you are not being ignored!!!]

[weiyingdown]

[going from startled to bemused to laughing out loud as he watches Lan Wangji attempt this one-handed]

Ahahahaha, can you cook one-handed like this? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll let you cook properly now. I was only having fun. I'll be good, you can let me go.

[one_note]

[he does not, though he is certainly having a bit of trouble cutting onion this way]

Mine.

[weiyingdown]

[shifting to try and make it easier for Lan Wangji to cut the onion...after a pause where he realizes that's ineffective, he reaches over to hold the onion for him]

Yes, it's your cooking, and I would feel bad ruining it. Especially if I'm the one eating it.

[one_note]

Hm.

[looks...faintly pleased...? goes back to cutting the onion up properly]

[weiyingdown]

[this is not fun. how did this happen. he watches Lan Wangji for a little while, letting himself be used as an extra pair of hands for holding things, but his patience runs out.]

If I'm going to be helping, then you should let me do some cooking too! I'm an excellent cook, you know.

[one_note]

No. A gift.

[weiyingdown]

A gift that I'm already helping with! Between the two of us, who is being more shameless here?

[one_note]

...

[lets him go, but looks faintly sulky about it and stops working on the food]

[weiyingdown]

[poking at his cheek]

What, did you want to hold me that badly? You were ignoring me just a minute ago. Wasn't I getting in your way?

[one_note]

[turns his head and bites Wei Wuxian's finger instead of answering.]

[weiyingdown]

[tugs his hand back and holding it protectively against his chest]

It was a simple question! How could you treat me like this?

[one_note]

Cook.

[Lan Wangji is a rude drunk]

[weiyingdown]

[HE ALWAYS IS!!!!

holds up a finger, a safe distance away from Lan Wangji's mouth]

How about a compromise? You cook for me, and I'll cook for you. We can taste each other's dishes.

[one_note]

...

[nods and picks up the kitchen knife again]

[weiyingdown]

[reaches for another knife and starts cutting up some carrots. this is gonna taste so bad]

[one_note]

[god. it's fine. Lan Wangji definitely just poured an entire jar of chili in the pot with the chickens. he's all in on this culinary nightmare]

[weiyingdown]

[Wei Wuxian sees him do this terrible thing to perfectly good food and gives a nod of approval as he dumps way too many spices into his own...concoction. to call it food would probably be a little discourteous to actual food.

somehow he acquires a wok and everything just goes straight into that, on a too-high heat. he steals a chili pepper from Lan Wangji's side and adds it to his monstrosity.]

Where did you learn how to cook? Is it still a secret?

[one_note]

[agreeing, as he stirs the pot]

Secret.

[weiyingdown]

[whatever is in his wok is starting to burn. its fine]

How about if you tell me, I'll tell you a secret in return?

[one_note]

...

Yunmeng. Caiyi. Books.

[weiyingdown]

A surprisingly tame answer, for all that you didn't want to tell me! But that's just like you.

[he has to hide a smile behind a hand]

Alright, fair's fair. So a secret from me in exchange. Hmm...But what's something that you don't already know about me?

[one_note]

What does Wei Ying want?

[weiyingdown]

...Want?

Besides dinner?