[blank faced, unable to understand the significance of the timing]
It would have to have been, wouldn't it? It's been thirteen years already. If you had known before then, I would have made you treat me to a meal sooner.
[tugs him in until they're standing by each other at the counter and puts an arm around him firmly, still dealing with the food preparations with his other hand
[going from startled to bemused to laughing out loud as he watches Lan Wangji attempt this one-handed]
Ahahahaha, can you cook one-handed like this? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll let you cook properly now. I was only having fun. I'll be good, you can let me go.
[shifting to try and make it easier for Lan Wangji to cut the onion...after a pause where he realizes that's ineffective, he reaches over to hold the onion for him]
Yes, it's your cooking, and I would feel bad ruining it. Especially if I'm the one eating it.
[this is not fun. how did this happen. he watches Lan Wangji for a little while, letting himself be used as an extra pair of hands for holding things, but his patience runs out.]
If I'm going to be helping, then you should let me do some cooking too! I'm an excellent cook, you know.
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I learned after you died.
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It would have to have been, wouldn't it? It's been thirteen years already. If you had known before then, I would have made you treat me to a meal sooner.
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Did you pick up any other hobbies? I'll keep it a secret, I promise.
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Do not die.
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I won't, once was more than enough. But do you really need to ignore me while you're cooking?
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there, now you are not being ignored!!!]
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Ahahahaha, can you cook one-handed like this? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'll let you cook properly now. I was only having fun. I'll be good, you can let me go.
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Mine.
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Yes, it's your cooking, and I would feel bad ruining it. Especially if I'm the one eating it.
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[looks...faintly pleased...? goes back to cutting the onion up properly]
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If I'm going to be helping, then you should let me do some cooking too! I'm an excellent cook, you know.
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[lets him go, but looks faintly sulky about it and stops working on the food]
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What, did you want to hold me that badly? You were ignoring me just a minute ago. Wasn't I getting in your way?
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It was a simple question! How could you treat me like this?
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[Lan Wangji is a rude drunk]
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holds up a finger, a safe distance away from Lan Wangji's mouth]
How about a compromise? You cook for me, and I'll cook for you. We can taste each other's dishes.
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[nods and picks up the kitchen knife again]
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