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[one_note]

[ TEXT | ACTION | IDK FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS ]

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[weiyingdown]

[runs his hand up into his hair, massaging the crown with the tips of his fingers]

That's a difficult task when there are two of me wandering around doing as we please.

[one_note]

Yes.

[said without rancor]

[weiyingdown]

[his hand slows for a moment; that isn't a problem he can fix on his own]

I never met your father. I don't know if what he did was right or wrong given the situation. So maybe I can't really say--but I'll say it anyways. I don't think you're like him at all. You aren't the kind of person who would lock away the people he cares about. I can't stop you from worrying about it. But I'm not worried at all, because I know you.

[one_note]

[soft, unable to ask him to stay, only able to say what he knows is true for himself:]

Would never.

[weiyingdown]

[kisses his chin, a quick little peck as he resumes massaging his head again]

You would never! And you would never need to. At least not with me. I'm right here.

[one_note]

You are here.

[repeats it like he's reassuring himself, arms steady around him...]

[weiyingdown]

I'm here. No need to worry.

[one_note]

[looks down at his face, eyes serious and soft]

No?

[weiyingdown]

No.

[equally quiet and serious as he gazes back]

What does staying with someone mean to you?

[one_note]

Something desired.

...

To face life beside them.

Partnership.

[weiyingdown]

[the way he says it makes it sound like it has some deeper meaning, but he can't pinpoint exactly what]

That's already what this is. Isn't it?

[one_note]

Is it?

[it is not a rhetorical question. they have not defined this in so many words, between themselves.]

[weiyingdown]

[weakly,]

Er-gege, a few days ago you wouldn't even say you wanted to go on a date with me. I can say whatever I want, but it doesn't matter if you don't agree with it.

[one_note]

...

Wanted to. If you did.

[weiyingdown]

I wanted to. But I wanted you to say that you wanted to. If you only say yes because I say yes, it makes it seem like you're just going with whatever I want.

[one_note]

[shakes his head]

Want to, even when you do not say yes.

[weiyingdown]

[his voice is low, nearly a whisper]

It's...hard to say yes if I don't know you want to.

[one_note]

[also low]

Always want to.

[weiyingdown]

Always?

[he already said it once, so it feels redundant to make him repeat himself. but he's anxious; it's too hard to believe]

[one_note]

Always want you.

[weiyingdown]

But don't you have...

[trails off, too unsure to finish that sentence. he can't fit the pieces together: desiring someone, being partners with someone, facing life beside them isn't the same as loving them. and Lan Wangji already has someone he loves. it would be too arrogant, even now, to think that love might be given to him]

...someone...else...?

[one_note]

[he

says absolutely nothing?

oh no]

[weiyingdown]

[HELPFULLY CLARIFIES]

You have someone you love. I don't want to get in the way of that, if it comes up in the future.

[one_note]

Will not.

[weiyingdown]

What makes you so sure?

[there is the chance that Lan Wangji's love has passed away, but who could he have loved that passed?]